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Gnarly, only just getting to this on. I wonder if your subconscious poking its head out in such a Jungian fashion was aided by a flashback. I was looking out the window of the bathroom today as I was taking a leak - it's always the bathroom that is my tripometer - and I wasn't sure if I was catching the edge of trails in the sunlight or not and it's been over 30 years since I've had any acid.

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Flashback... hmm, never thought of it that way. I think it was more of a violent uprising of suppressed feeling. I did have some bad trips, but (fortunately) they weren't bloody horror-shows like this vision.

btw, I've learned recently that while Freud used "subconscious," Jung always preferred "unconscious," in part to differentiate himself from his former mentor. For those in the know, it's a subtle way of telling who's read who, and how closely ;)

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I absolutely relate to this. I’ve felt very similar feelings. Unsurprising since I’m convinced we’re related or soul brothers or something. Yeah, that whirring wild anarchic panic attack blast of fear/shame. Yes. The brutality of total loneliness. Yes. You nail down that lost, wandering in Purgatory feeling.

“Why would I want to identify myself semi-permanently with what should be a transitory psychological state?”

I just did a piece on identity: https://michaelmohr.substack.com/p/the-poison-of-identity

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